I still can’t believe that I am down to the last day of the challenge. Did that really happen? I’m not hallucinating right? This is it, the last day, the last challenge and all I can say is that this is the most trickiest question among the bunch, one that I haven’t been asked by anyone ever, except myself.
The last challenge/question is am I happy with my life right now. How should I answer that? I know it’s supposed to be a simple yes or no thing but I feel it is something more, something I haven’t answered no matter how many times I asked myself. Am I happy with my life right now?
I read somewhere that happiness is a state of mind, it is what you make it. One could have all the misfortunes in the world and still could say that they are happy because they know that no matter how unfortunate they are as of the moment, the time would come that everything would turn out for the best, I can’t really tell though. Am I happy?
This question makes me really look at my current situation, my now, and delve deeply on what’s happening to my life. Currently I am employed, earning less that $1000 dollars a month without tax. I am a thousand miles away from my homeland, from my family and from a few close friends. I live with people that mostly do not understand what I feel and the way I think. So, am I happy? What is happiness? It’s a word with a meaning that I somehow can’t fully grasp; sometimes it’s a mystery.
When I was younger and life is way simpler than now, I could be happy with just the thought of not having classes every Saturday and Sunday. I smile brightly and sometimes jump up and down whenever my mother would tell me that I’ll be spending my summer or Christmas vacation with my grandfather and grandmother from my mother’s side. Going to the farm makes me giddy, even if I have to walk a long way just to reach there. Those days, being happy is as easy as being given a piece of candy. Those were the days.
At this point, I’m going to give my answer to the challenge, to completely nail it. At the moment, I am
somewhat happy because despite what I have mentioned about my current situation, I am still alive and has the chance to turn everything around any time I deem to. I’m contented with what I have because I have enough. I am doing what I can under the circumstances that I know is almost at its end; just the thought makes me smile already. I have my family even if they are far away, I have a brother who has my back, who understand all my twisted reasoning. I have a few close friends who doesn’t judge me and whom I know will never get tired of hearing me whine every once in a while. I have Anne and Maan whom I can talk to whenever I want decent, meaningful conversation. I have dramas to fill all my nights (and early mornings.) Thus, I say that I am happy right now.
This concludes the challenge, my 30 day blog challenge. It’s amazing how I stuck with it and didn’t give in to my lazy self, that’s something. And knowing that I can do something like this makes me confident that I can challenge myself some more and I am gonna do so, at my own phase and time.